Well I finally called the infusion center and set up an appointment; 3 days of Solu-medrol, 1,000mg a day, 1 hour a day. Yay steroids! I am actually looking forward to it for a couple reasons. The first and obvious reason is I want to get better! Since I am seeing some improvement with just the oral Prednisone I have been taking the the IV steroids should clear this all up in no time. Secondly I just want to get out of the house even if that means going to Kaiser to get my arm stabbed with an IV! Sad I know, I am so bored that I am looking forward to going to the hospital… Maybe I just want to be around people? It has been a lonely couple of days… Haha…
Speaking of loneliness… I am lonely. More so now that I figured out that my ex is seeing someone new… I mean… Good for her but… Its hard for me… Its funny how one minute all I could think of was the bad times and now all I can think about is the good times… Interesting… Especially since it was I who ultimately broke it off… We are weird, human beings, I mean it shouldn’t be effecting me the way it is but.. It is… I had such a hard time sleeping last night because all I could think about was her… I hate this… Its extra hard because I don’t have much of a life, much of anything to keep me occupied so all I do all day is think.
So that leads me to the next thing I took care of today: I applied for Dial a Ride. No not for a job, although that would be kind of ironic, but to be able to use their services. If I can get approved for that then I can use it to get down the street and volunteer at the hospital! Maybe not the funnest thing ever but I need something to do with my life so I am not sitting around doing nothing all day. Volunteering will help my life feel more fulfilling, give me something to wake up for, give me something to talk about, give me a place to meet new people’ possibility;y network a bit, and it will help out with my resume! So it’s a win-win all around I just need to get the transportation aspect knocked out.
Hopefully I can get this going so that I can start rebuilding some kind of life again and maybe the money will follow but for now I just want something to do so that I am not wasting so much time and so that I can meet new people and not come off as a looser haha… If I had something to do I probably wouldn’t feel so lonely either, time would not go by so slow. We shall see, but I am going to leave it at that, I typed this all out using my fingers! It took me so long and involved so much correcting but I did it and now my hands hurt!
“What was and what could have been only leads to the present”