I know, I know, I have STILL been slacking on my blog! What’s wrong with me?!?!? Well I’ll tell you. Depression is a horrible, horrible thing isn’t it? You can’t think straight, you become irrational, the stupidest things make you want to brake down and cry yourself into a state of deadly dehydration, it makes you want to sleep all day, you can’t function or work as well as you should, you loose sense of your priorities, and the world looses all of it’s color. Although that last one could be a vision issue, might want to check that out.
Anyways yes, I have clearly been morbidly depressed for the last few weeks. I realize that this could be do to the fact that I have not been on any antidepressants for some time, something I have been on for years to help keep me stable… I’m not sure yet if I should start back up on my old stuff or start taking the new stuff again even though I originally thought that it could have been the source of my itching. I now know that it’s not because I have not taken it for weeks but I am still having these itching attacks but because they started around the time I started taking that new medication it play’s mind tricks on me… But the itching is definitely a symptom because it gets worse or pops up when it’s hot or I’m stressed… Just spent about an hour in the kitchen around the hot stove and now I’m starting to itch… Horrible, horrible, horrible symptom….
Aside from my depression I am physically
doing better. My hands are the only thing that really stand out to me as still not fully recovering to my “baseline” but they are well enough that I can type again so that makes life a little less stressful. Of course I still have many other symptoms I am dealing with but like I said… I am simply getting back to my baseline which was not 100% to begin with. Since I felt my exacerbation was definitely over, I decided last night to start taking my LDN again. For anyone wondering I am taking 4.5mg. After I finish writing this quick blog I am going to decide what to do about my antidepressants, organize aaaaallllllllll
my pills for the week, and get back on my “healthy” routine. I have already been on top of my Copaxone since this last exacerbation so now I just got to add the pills back into the picture. On top of all that I am looking into some dietary changes again, specifically the McDougall Plan
. I recommend you check out his website
and watch his video on MS by clicking HERE
. It’s about an hour long and starts off kind of rough but gets really interesting pretty quick! He is basically continuing Dr. Swank’s work in the world of dieting and disease treatment (in this case Multiple Sclerosis).
I have an appointment with a therapist soon and will also be getting my spinal MRI finally! School starts back up at the end of this month so I really am hoping that things will start turning around in my personal life so I can better deal with my health. This Friday marks my “One Year Anniversary” with MS and I am trying by best not to slip back into the pit of depression as I feel I am starting to reach the edge of getting out of this hole but it’s been one year…. ONE WHOLE YEAR and I feel as though I have not moved forward in the least bit… Still no car, still no job, nothing and that depresses me… So I’m trying not to think about it, trying not to think about it, purple buckets, purple buckets, purple buckets!
Haha well, that’s it for now. I’m going to try to share a little bit more about what I have been studying in the world of MS while I try to turn my life around this month so I will try my best to get back on top of my blog.
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ALSO! Let me know what you think about the new look… I was bored and decided to switch it up a bit but I don’t know if I really like it, kind of looks less professional but maybe it’s just me so be HONEST! Haha, THANKS!!